I'm also a hypocrite.
It all works out rather nicely, doesn't it?
The UMR bug has been offically attributed to gremlins. We can't reproduce it, and we can't be more than 99.9% certain that it was actually an issue, so we're going to ignore it until it comes back and bites us on the ass. Aren't we smart?
In the meantime, I'm going to suggest adding a special section to the user guides for all our products, advising users not to expose them to water, not to expose them to the sun or bright lights (it can kill them!) and most importantly of all, to never, never feed them after midnight.
I think that'll go over real well.