I Feel Like a Vampire


Not for any of the usual reasons. It just seem lately that whenever I find myself engaged in introspection I come up with nothing; my attempts at reflection are thwarted by the fact that there's not all that much to reflect.

I know I'm a no-frills sort of person; I don't feel all that much all that often. I sometimes fool myself that I'm just the proverbial still waters running deep, but on some level I know that's not true. I experience affection in the same way Data does; "As I experience certain sensory input patterns, my mental pathways become accustomed to them. The inputs are eventually anticipated and even missed when absent".

Which of course leads me back to the one question that haunts me day and night; does this make me a bad person?

I'd like to argue that the simple fact that I worry about this amounts to an answer in the negative, but that also feels like self delusion.

And while I'm on the subject, why do I even care whether I'm good or evil when I don't believe in Heaven or Hell?